WITHIN: Graded primarily on heat and narrative
WITHOUT: Graded primarily on narrative
Possible spoilers below …
WITHIN
The Adventures of Eggy in Time and Space (mc mf ff hu) (new) by Otrebanks
–2.5/5 (not great, had some redeeming qualities)–
That’s an unnecessarily long author’s note to be ignored … Anyway, it’s written well enough, but from the start, it was clear there wasn’t going to be much of a story. “It all started with a big bang. Orgy that is …” Maybe I was skimming a bit, but there really wasn’t much of a story here. Plus, I’m not even sure if I picked up on what the MC was, or if there was any. Though, there must have been … Yes, there was heat, but nearly 7k words of nearly just that is a bit tiresome. Am I getting old?
(ReReadability: low / follow: no)
Caitlin Looses Herself to Halloween (mc mf md) (new) by wwillia5
–4/5 (pretty good, not perfect but enjoyable)–
Interesting from the start, while written without any glaring errors, and some nice heat to top it off. An antique silver knife from Salem, MA? What could possible go wrong? 
Felt a bit like a tease, even though this was done quite well, overall. We never actually saw the TF: Only the before and after, it would seem. I hope there’s more, if only because I got the “so, what happens next!?” tickle …
(ReReadability: moderate / follow: yes)
WITHOUT
Wind Shear (mc mf md) (new) by Julian Winslow
~~2.5/5 (not great, had some redeeming qualities)~~
Not as pulled into this as much as some I’m sure. Characters I don’t know having described problems from the get-go elicits little to know emotion response from me … This was written just fine for what it was, but took a while to peak my interest. It did get weird, and that helped a lot.
(ReReadability: Low / Follow: no)
RANDOM COMMENTS
Though I occasionally do enjoy a hypnosis story, I too often find the fall into the trance a bit tedious and overlong. I mean, a good stage hypnotist knows most of the audience really just wants to see the subjects do the Martian National Anthem!
The Realms of Mr. Potestas 