10 19 ‘013 EMCSA Update

WITHIN: Graded primarily on heat and narrative
WITHOUT: Graded primarily on narrative
Possible spoilers below …

WITHIN
In The Story (mc mf md ft sf) (new)  by Tang
–2.5/5 (not great, had some redeeming qualities)–

Maybe I wasn’t in the right mood, but the air of mystery didn’t really grab me. Written well enough, though. However, it felt like there was too much background given before anything started to happen. If this is meant to be a longer story, there’s no need to push backstory so much so early. I admit, it’s an interesting premise, and I definitely liked the nuance of it. However, it just didn’t grab me as much as I hoped.
(ReReadability: low / follow: no)

Spiral Eyes (mc mf ff md) (new)  by Ramaset
–3.5/5 (good, not quite earth shattering)–

ePad? What could that possibly be based on? :P Written well enough, but felt like it didn’t have to be as long as it was. No real surprises here, not that devious from the reader’s perspective. Perhaps it didn’t grab me as much as it should have, but I enjoyed this overall.
(ReReadability: low / Follow: no)

WITHOUT
Love Potion No. 13 (mc mf ff md) (new)  by b4uweremine
~~1.5/5 (poor +, need to be mesmerized to really like this)~~

The grammar was generally all right, but the writing read somewhat awkwardly. Just didn’t flow in any real way, making the narrative feel like it was rambling most of the time. This was incredibly straight forward without any real nuance. Certainly not the worst I’ve ever read. This just needed another edit or two to make this a readable story.
(ReReadability: Low / Follow: no)

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