2/23/13 EMCSA 23 Update

WITHIN: Graded primarily on heat and narrative
WITHOUT: Graded primarily on narrative
Possible spoilers below …

WITHIN
Cursed — Return of the Idol (mc ff) (new)  by Melissa Dubban
–2/5 (so-so, maybe a good story to others but didn’t mesmerize me)–

I must admit, I vaguely remember reading the first chap of the first Cursed a while back, but didn’t follow it for whatever reason … Anyway, not terribly pulled in from the start, but there was definite polish. I have to admit, though, they seemed to shrug off what might have been a horrible accident way too easily. Also, perhaps it was explained via the prior story, but the appearance of the Idol seemed just too random, too mysterious. Maybe it was all a bit too blunt, too. We go from one narrative extreme (mysteriousness) to another (bluntness) very quickly. Also, it would have been a hell of a lot better if the Idol didn’t “talk.” Plus, whether they were weak willed or whatever (unclear), the changes were just way too fast to be all that enjoyable. Suspension of disbelief, yes, but it can be hard when things are written the way this one is. Much of it just ended up being too dark for my tastes.
(Readability: low / follow: no)

Dream a Little Dream (mc ff) (new)  by Lisa Teez
–4.5/5 (very good, all but orgasmic)–

I’m not sure if I was meant to be jumping for joy for a character we just met finally getting a job. Like I always say, it takes more than a couple paragraphs for me to feel anything for fictional characters … Anyway, it gets better as it goes along. Even though it was kinda predictable, the heat was quite good. That heat would perhaps be a bit dark for me normally, but it was done it way that made me enjoy it greatly. This was a fine piece.
(Readability: moderate / Follow: no)

WITHOUT
Replacement Actress (mc mf gr) (new)  by Changeme
~~2/5 (so-so, maybe a good story to others but didn’t mesmerize me)~~

No one and nothing in this story is real? Anyway, I don’t remember if it was this author, but I saw “Uhn” used before instead of “Err” or “Oh” or whatever. For whatever reason, still don’t like “Uhn,” and therefore still a nitpick. As a side note, I personally find C-cup to be about perfect, while that can vary depending on body type. Also, the story seemed a bit generically male oriented in how it suggested Kaylee secretly wanted bigger boobs, while a guy tried to force that on her via a contract she willingly signed. Plus, I’m sure C would only be small for boob oriented porn, because, say, feet oriented porn does not usually have women with back braking boobs. Also, it all seemed a little convenient that her friend looked just like her, while she had a pharmacist friend, and how she so easily slipped into another woman’s life … The writing is well polished at least, but this just didn’t mesh with me.
(ReReadability: Low / Follow: no)

RANDOM COMMENTS
I grunt every time Vampires and Succubi are automatically seen as generically evil by the protagonist. Hell, even Coppola’s Dracula rendition showed the eponymous Vamp as more tragic figure than merely just evil!

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