10/28/12 EMCSA Update

WITHIN: Graded primarily on heat and narrative
WITHOUT: Graded primarily on narrative
Possible spoilers below …

WITHIN
Late Night TV  (mc ff gr) (new) by   Idlemane
–2/5 (so-so, maybe a good story to others but didn’t mesmerize me)–

Though the writing did show some polish, it seemed rather stilted from the start. No real run-ons, but the sentences and paragraphs just seemed to ramble. As someone else also mentioned, the storyline seemed rather generic. The ending was also just too over the top and ridiculous. Perhaps if it took a couple of chapters to get there then it would have been all right … Those issues made me skim fairly early on. Bimbo transformation purists may find enjoyment in this genre piece, but this just didn’t mesh with me.
(ReReadability: low / Follow: no)

Quantum of Horace  (mc mf ff) (new) by   Lisa Teez
–3/5 (decent, not perfect)–

Though it’s obviously a pun on 007: Quantum of Solace, Quantum of Horace may oddly work as a 007 title as well … Anyway, I found this enjoyable from the start. A witch pretending to be a human dressed as a witch and related is quite enjoyable. A nitpick is the use of “heck” here, it seemed silly and unnecessary. My only real complaint is how the comma usage seems inconstant, but it did not detract from the story. My punctuation isn’t always perfect either Smiley With an ending that may have been a touch silly, this ultimately becomes another bimbo story, made unique by the fact that there were witches and ghosts, I mean, specters.

WITHOUT
Fucktoberfest (mc mf) (new) by   Lisa Teez
~~2/5 (so-so, maybe a good story to others but didn’t mesmerize me)~~

Relatively polished from the start, while the comma usage again seems inconsistent. I don’t know, that issue probably has more to do with the differences in differing grammatical schools, all of which have their own merit. For instance, I was trained to avoid “get” outside dialogue, which I do, but I don’t really care that much … Anyway, this didn’t pull me in as well as Quantum, and I didn’t really like where this all led. This is kinda a German bimbification story, which I admittedly never saw before. Otherwise, I found this rather straight forward: two ladies walk into a bar, and get transformed to frack a bunch of men. I thought the use of germanic accent made it all a bit too silly, too, for whatever reason. This one just didn’t mesh with me.
(ReReadability: low / Follow: no)

RANDOM COMMENTS
I must admit to getting aroused in that wolf make out scene in Cabin in the Woods, probably thanks to the MC elements behind it. Good Gods, that was the weirdest arousal ever!

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